Most kids have extracurricular activities like after school sports or music lessons. I grew up going to the doctor. I had a chronic bladder infection problem from age 7 to 17. I was going to the doctor an average of once a week. Tests of every kind and specialists in every field. And then one day I just didn’t get another infection. I went on with my life.
I mention this because while other people developed a sense of agility or rhythm due to their investments, I have developed a keen sense of direction and location. I can locate a toilet anywhere faster than you can say, “Where’s the john?” At no time during my waking existence am I unaware of my distance from and relative location to the nearest commode. It is a talent. I'm like a homing pigeon about porcelain.
The need for such flexibility all my life made me get over the phobias that most people have about public restrooms. Early on I figured I couldn’t exactly get snooty about using what ever facilities were within my access. I've since educated myself and am well informed about sanitation issues in this regard. Lots of people have a real problem about hygiene in these settings, but I know that any problems you may develop “down there” are not likely to be blamed on a toilet and the contact, or lack thereof, with the surfaces of the entire room. If you grew up with a mom that told you different, let me be clear: she lied. If you feel a deep seeded need to tell me I'm frighteningly wrong and how you can list pages of icky diseases to be had from even looking at commercial tile, let me save you some trouble. I’ll smile and nod.
All of this is to mention that I was in a public restroom yesterday and was surprised to see my surroundings. I was at a hole in the wall kind of gas station/convenience mart. It was a tiny little establishment with no pretenses whatsoever. But the bathroom really shifted the context. It was clean, we can start there. It was one of those one-toilet bathrooms, where you have to bolt the door and hope to God it actually works so you don’t get walked in on. The inside was decorated in a warm vanilla paint and it had – get this – plaster columns embedded into the corners. Between the twisted scroll columns were sculpture reliefs of women carrying water urns. Very Pompeii but in a green monochrome. Weird. I will even venture to say that it wasn’t cheesy. It was actually quite tastefully done. The scale was appropriate, the choice to go with a monochromatic palette was well-founded, and the application was of decent quality.
This made me think about all the bathrooms I've visited over the years and the things I've seen in there. Then the train of thought led me to decide that I am going to put together a photo essay of sorts about the bathrooms that I come across in a month’s time. I always carry a camera around in my purse anyway, and lately it has gotten zero use at all. I’m uninspired by too much these days. I need to pick up the pace in my aesthetic realm of existence. Maybe this’ll spark some interesting photos and such.
Anyway, I'm officially beginning on the first of August and will end the project on the 31, at which point, I will post all the photos accumulated. Feel free to share your bathroom pics, be they in your homes or in public places.
I know what you mean. When I was younger, I used to fear so bad that if I completely sat on public toilets for too long, I'd become gay. Finally, I'd had enough of holding myself up and just started sitting down. The amount of men I've slept with since that time is merely a coincidence.
ReplyDeleteIn a (not at all) similar project to yours, I once wrote down every bit of bathroom wall poetry and wisdom that I saw for close to a year. No, my sanity is not in question. There's no question about it.
I hope you make sure to get a picture of the unpretentious, yet fancy one you talked about.
It'll be the first.
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